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How same-sex parents share their mental burden


“We’re like,’Wow, this is a tough job,'” he said. Marocco whose family depends on a part-time nanny. “In many ways, our own work is much easier than becoming a parent.”

Dr. Swenson of New America helps families experiment with ways to better divide the mental burden of running a household. One method, called the “kitchen buddy” experiment, requires a couple to pair for a particular task. For example, one always loads the dishwasher and the other unloads it. Cooking cannot be accomplished unless each person fulfills his or her role.

She added that creating a built-in nudge system could also work. This is because you don’t need a “household CEO” to issue commands. At her house, a doctor. Swenson, who is married to a woman, uses magnets in the fridge to remind everyone of the order in which they clean the toilet.

Dr. Bisexual Swenson said in his relationship with men, “I wore a cruise director and a quality control hat” and “it was an example of a mentally stressed women’s textbook.”

“I wore it almost like a quiet feminist badge of honor,” she said.

The table changed when she finally married a woman. Her wife, who is part of Cuba, grew up in a clean family where her cleanliness was important and an important part of her culture. She had a “strict bed making every morning” routine, Dr. Swenson said. And shortly after they ate, the dishes were cleaned up and placed in the dishwasher.

“For the first time, I felt like a man,” he said. If things are “clean enough”, it’s okay Swenson grew up in a family.



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